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How to Make a Change in Your Life

Hey Everyone,

So what I realized last year, is that you don't need to wait for the perfect moment, most convenient moment or a new year to make new resolutions, changes or do something you have always wanted to do!

Perfect moment?
If you want a change, there is no perfect moment, you have to take action yourself. Because we all live in the future. Thinking that after this year, I'll be true to myself and let some people who make ME a negative person go, just let go and start thinking for myself, or I'll change this, after I pass this exam. This is the kind of way you have to stop thinking! Don't wait for the perfect moment, take the moment and make it perfect! This is one of my favorite quotes, it helps me remind myself, that I don't need to wait for something to happen, to do something I want! I mean why should something or someone decide when or what you can or should do? Why give other people the power to decide whether you can or can't do something? If you want something or a change, just go for it! The only one who can stop you for doing something you want, is you!

My Example, True Story
About two years ago I had some friends that where really sweet to me, like they were nice! But one of them thought she was always right! Like opinions of others didn't really matter, because she only said right things. And you know sometimes friends say something bad about you, as a joke, like: "You look ugly today!" But they say it like, you know it's a joke, and they don't mean it. I got comments like, ugh that zitt on your face looks so gross, you should pinch it! And I was like, I actually don't like to do it like that, I'd rather just use a better face wash and probably eat healthier or something, which is my choice of how I want to handle my problems/insecurities. This is what made me so insecure about myself, not only this comment! This is just an example. As you probably know me as a blogger, I love fashion! So I love to experiment a bit with colors and new outfits. So sometimes I wore like statement shoes, like bright colored shoes, with a black outfit and then maybe a golden necklace, and I got really nice compliments like: Those shoes look so great with your outfit, and those really suit you! I was of course really happy to hear these nice compliments! But then right after I got these nice compliments, she would say: Those shoes are actually nice, well on the other side they kind of also look like clown shoes! And she said that with a really, I don't know negative smile, I guess, like I knew I was getting a compliment, but it didn't feel like it because it felt really negative. Some people suck the positivity out of you, you have to change that!

Okay enough about the ugly comments, but the point is, this person always made me feel negative about myself in some way. Even if it wasn't meant that way, I could definitely feel negativity and since I noticed I kept feeling more insecure about myself, I was quite sure that I didn't like the way I was feeling and got treated by her. I noticed that I stopped giving my own opinion about things, because there was always a negative comment attached by her! Also whenever I talked to someone else instead of her, she always made a really mean comment about them. Long story short: I was getting more insecure, and thinking more negative!

When that school year ended, when this all got worse, I finally started thinking: What can I do to change the way I feel? What can I do to finally stand up for myself? How can I make new friends? I already had a really good friend, but she was in an other class, so I didn't see her much! So I started to look for blog articles like this and started watching a lot of inspirational videos about being more confident! What helped me a lot to get confident again was (and still is) watching Bethany Mota videos, it helped me being more confident about my fashion style, because I really didn't think of what I liked anymore.. So that is what definitely helped, also I talked a lot to my mother about this, and that also helped! This was the time I realized, the only person who can change me, is me! I also talked about this to my best friend from the other class, I also got really good advice from her, she absolutely knew what I was going through and experienced almost the same thing! So when the next school year started I was so nervous, I can't tell you, but it was like now or never! I am ready for this! Change the negative way you're feeling now or continue being sad about it! So of course I didn't want to yell everything out loud in her face, about how mean she was to me, I didn't want to accuse her, because I let it come so far, I should have stood up for myself earlier! So instead of that, the first day of school I started talking to other people too, complimenting them and of course smiling more! I was shocked how good I felt after that, also of course that friend again made a negative comment like: Stop talking to them, you look weird, and you're too loud, in my head I was like: Excuse me! I have been that shy girl for a long time now, I'm just normally having a conversation with other girls, and yet you are again judging me, while you should honestly look at yourself for once!
Because the truth is, I wasn't being loud at all, I was just really excited and happy! And some of the girls where already good friends of mine, I just didn't hang out with them that much anymore, because I was only with the one friend who made me feel terrible!
 So my advice: Hang out with people who make you a better person, accept you for who you are and most important make you smile! 

So this is how I started to be more confident about myself, I was talking to more people, I started giving my own opinion and thinking more positively!
And of course after that I had a lot of fights with her, but that's not wrong, that's just standing up for myself and being steadfast about my opinion got me through it, slowly I only started hanging out with people that where nice, and I actually never talked to her again, I'm so grateful for my class that year, like all the girls are so supportive and we are so close, I made great friends! And I am not shy or afraid anymore to hang out with other people! I really am grateful, that I finally made a change I wanted to make for years, to be more confident!

Leave the negative, follow the positive!

Now I have true friends, I actually talk a lot and don't really think about what others think about my fashion style, but me!
So I thank myself today for making that decision and stay true to who I am!

Also I wish the best for that person, beside the things I wrote down about some things that happened, I have had fun times with her too, studying and talking about vacation and stuff was fun!

Blogging has helped me a lot, writing about all the positive and the negative feelings and it also made me feel more confident! So you're not feeling yourself? Just write it off, as I like to say it! Whether you post it or just keep it for yourself, it's your choice, but this is a great way of getting that negative load of you! I finally made a blog post of what happened two years ago when I found myself and my courage.

I also watched a lot of positive YouTube videos, and this one from Mimi Ikonn helped me a lot! I felt really positive after watching this and felt like I wasn't the only one, that has dealt with situations like mine!

I hope this blog post helped you in some way! Maybe you're in a situation like this or have learnt to get through it like me or maybe this helped you in another way! Let me know!



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